No one warned me about senior year. Everyone would just smile, hug me, and tell me how proud I must be. I was proud alright. Proud that on this day I didn't end up in jail needing bail money.
You see, senior year is much like the birthing process. Except instead of birthing a tiny human you are birthing an adult. Which, if you ask me, is a much more difficult and emotional task.
When our first daughter entered senior year, I decorated her car with the window chalk that read "This is my last first day of school." I had pictures of her holding her kindergarten picture. I cried as she drove off to school thinking gosh where have 18 years gone? How can we be here already? But here we were. So in those first days when people would hug me and say "You must be so proud", my heart would swell and my eye would leak with excitement and anxiety as we prepared her for the first day of the rest of her life.
Well, those sappy tear filled moments were quickly followed by the exorcist/mommy dearest moments. No one warned me that on any given day my husband would have to hold me back from strangling my darling sweet child because of something completely ridiculous she said. Because after all she was "grown" and could figure things out on her own. humph.
My friends, no one will prepare you for the feelings you are about to encounter during your child's senior year. There will be a multitude of moments when you like at your child as if he/she were an alien from a different planet. This is mostly because of something stupid that has fallen out of their mouth and landed on your ears. Those moments usually catch you off guard. So here are a few simple things I think you should know in order to endure your child's senior year.
1. The obvious is all the tears you will shed. Tears of joy, sorrow, and heartache that you are really old enough to have an 18 year old child. Tears when you pick out the infant pictures to use for the yearbook, or the senior slide show, or the graduation pictures. Tears when you see the graduation pictures and all you can see is your 5 year old going off to kindergarden all over again. So, it's safe to say there are tears. Be ready for them.
2. Through the tears you will inevitably empty your wallet. Senior year is not cheap. Be prepared to drop hundreds of dollars on nothing really. I remember shopping for graduation decorations at Hobby Lobby with my husband. I am crying, almost uncontrollably down the aisles as I pick out things. I remember asking my husband through all my tears "At what point do I stop buying stuff?" His response was "At this point I am not telling you no in fear of a complete mental breakdown in the craft store. So put whatever you want in the buggy." So my friends, put whatever you want in your buggy and spend what you can afford because this senior year event does only come once. I equated senior year to pre-deployment. You can have whatever you want cause it will make you happy and retail therapy makes me happy.
3. College applications are NO JOKE. I'm surprised they don't want a blood sample. There is no easy way around applications or scholarships. Your child will have to do most of the work to get these filled out. Because after all they are now an adult and can figure out this application thing on their own. Your senior child feels the need to exercise his/her authority over his/her own life. They know that they don't have to fill out all of the application for the college because Jonny didn't have to and he got in. They will also procrastinate on any scholarship opportunity because they think the mom and dad cash cow will continue to fund them until they get a real job. What their underdeveloped frontal cortex lacks is the ability to understand that for most kids, the mom and dad cash cow stops the minute they leave for school. It's not that we don't support them, send them money or pay for a thing here or there. But soon enough they will have to understand that after a night out with friends and spending every last penny they have cannot be made up by doing chores around the house to earn some extra money. One of the best things you can do for your child (if your child isn't a senior already) is to make them have a job and pay for car expenses through high school. This helps develop that frontal cortex reasoning that money does not grow on trees and there isn't an endless supple for everyone in the world. What they don't realize is we as parents are desperately wanting the application to be done correctly so in a few months they will leave our house and we can once again have our mind back. But getting your child to take the process seriously will bring out your worst mommy dearest moments. Which are usually quickly followed by a drink and thanking God that you didn't act on your instincts which then would have landed you in jail needing bail money. And bail money takes away from the Hobby Lobby/retail therapy money, so it really is a blessing.
4. Oh those mommy dearest moments. I know most of us know them well from various other events in our lives. They are not our prettiest moment. We like to hide them in the closet under lock and key so those outside of our homes don't know that we indeed have that mom quality. You will indeed have more of these moments than you care to admit and might even have them in public. But when that happens, all you need to do is look at the other mothers and say senior year. We will all nod in approval and if possible hand you a glass of wine.
5. Oh mama, this too shall pass. Before you know it the craziness of senior year is over. You are checking them in to their dorms and the crazy emotions start all over. In preparation for moving to college I know you will be at Bed Bath and Beyond more than once buying all sorts of things. You will have planned out the most articulate trip for dropping your child off at college and in reality it will end up in more chaos, tears, and frustration. My advice to you for college move would be to take yourself, your husband/significant other, and the child leaving. Everyone else will get in the way, drive you crazy, and make you thankful that once again you didn't end up in jail. But, this too shall pass.
Hang on to the wild ride of senior year. It isn't all pretty and wrapped in a bow like people make you think it is. It is a huge event filled with all sorts of emotions. It will last the ENTIRE senior year. Just when you think you are over the hurdle, your child will open their mouth and let something completely idiotic escape their lips. Just smile, clench your fist behind your back, kiss them on the forehead, and open a bottle of wine. I suggest having several of your favorite drinks on hand for any given day.
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