It's a Secret

There were days as a young mom that I couldn't wait for my children to be older. I wanted them to be able to feed themselves and walk. Then there were days that I couldn't wait for them to play sports so I could be their cheerleader. I was sure when the kids were older things would be easier. (we had 4 under the age of 6)

Boy was I wrong. When they were little I was able to put them in their seat on the counter with me while I baked or cooked dinner. They didn't talk back or ask why and they certainly didn't require me to play the role of mom taxi. Unless of course it was to a 'playdate' which translated to adult time with another mommy.

While I am enjoying the days with my children as they grow, change and discover who they are- I am not enjoying teenager attitudes, friends that I don't agree with, mom taxi extraordinaire, and at what point did I become mommy dearest?



There are days I find myself saying "self, today we won't yell at the children. Today we are going to remember to remain calm, cool and collected." HA. That NEVER happens. I find myself with only one volume that gets my children's attention. It's the same tone as Joan Crawford used when she screamed "NO WIRE HANGERS." That is the only pitch in which my children look at me with fear in their eyes and realize I have lost it for the day. With their dad constantly gone it doesn't take long for me to hit that point.

When you are about to become a new mom no one tells you about the crazy that your bundle of joy will make you. Crazy with fear as they venture into a world with threats and opportunities that didn't exist when you were a child. I sure wasn't told about how crazy of a driver I would be. At first it was super slow driver because there is a tiny package in the car. Then it becomes road rage lady as you are rushing child 3 to practice only to roll to a stop, push him out, and rush to pick up child 1. Driving 300 miles in 4 days will make anyone crazy. Those are just a few of the things that parenting books leave out. They also leave out that while most days I am so tired of driving I want to crawl under the covers and pretend I didn't see that it was morning, these are the days I will miss.

It won't be long before child 1 is off to college. I'm not sure I can even process that at this moment. Next year we will have two high school children and one middle school. (along with one elementary) How did I get here so fast? Another quick tip is that no parenting book or expert will tell you that once your children start school you enter the express lane of life. It was just yesterday child 1 was starting school. I remember the day like it was yesterday. When she starts school next year she will be a junior in high school.

Moms out there embrace every moment that you have. Even if it is a mommy dearest moment. It's these moments that we didn't learn in a parenting book or by watching an expert on TV. It is the real life lessons that teach us how to be parents and what's important. The lessons that you can only learn from living and doing things.

My children aren't always perfect and their have been times when they did something and I wanted to crawl under a rock from embarrassment. (that too is not in a book) but those moments I learned how to be a better parent (after I stopped yelling like mommy dearest) and my children learned a lesson that will help shape them into the adult they will be.