Physically my husband is healing. He is walking around with the help of a boot on his leg. (he hates the boot) Today he is headed back to work. Most of the day will be filled with doctor appointments but we are finally back to a some what normal schedule for us.
No matter how long you are in a relationship there comes a point when the two of you have spent entirely to much time together and are now driving each other crazy. That point for me was about 2 weeks ago.
Since he came home I have been in school. I am carrying a full course load this semester. I knew having to help care for him in addition to school and regular mom duties was going to be difficult. It has been difficult, not physically but mentally.
My husband was told to stay home and off his foot for about a month. The doctor told him to use the crutches to help him walk and gradually put weight on his foot. I thought to myself, okay that should take a few weeks. More like a few days. Over the past month he has become more mobile and able to walk longer distances.
During the past month my husband has described himself as feeling in a funk. I can relate to that funk. It happens when you sit around the house to long. Before you know it one day in your PJ's turns into 7 and you can't remember if you showered today or not. It's during those funk days that you look at all the things around you that need to be done, work on accomplishing those tasks and then say 'eh what's the point?' You sit down, turn the TV on and before you know it it's now time for bed.
I don't think my husband has ever experienced this funk before. Most of us moms know it well. It can sneak up on you and strike at a moments notice. It has been difficult to watch my husband muddle through this part of his healing. He would often want me to sit with him and watch TV or hang out on the front porch. I feel like he thought since he had nothing to do I should keep him company.
Today as he left for work I was silently cheering inside. We were finally getting back to some sort of normal life. Work, school, activities, etc. I crave that normal schedule. I was also cheering because I know that getting back to our regularly scheduled programming will help my husband shake the funk feeling.
Healing is a process. I am reminded that all the emotions we are going through is part of that process. Music is helping us on our journey of healing. Lately when I hear the word healing I think of this Micheal W Smith song. I love the line "I'm not afraid." I hope you enjoy it like I do.
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